the place of a woman…

the place of a woman is in the home.

my sister and i were having this conversation the other week. it was actually because this ‘aunty’ came to our house for a darse (religous gathering) and claimed that the ‘bottom line’ of what the Prophets’ (pbuh) teaching, in relation to women anyway, was that the place of a woman is in the home. this she claims is the reason for her staying home. infact, she explained that the only condition she has placed on her husband is to stay at home and to never go hungry, or to have something in her stomach, as she put it (not quite in those words, but you get what she means). then came obviously my inquisitive sister (who usually, might i add, is not as inquisitive as she was at this particular occasion, usually she’s the one doing the talking whilst everyone else is listening, or rather pretending to listen (you know i love you) who’s genuine interest in what this woman was saying, really just added fuel to the fire. yes there was a fire. in me! so anyway, off she goes on a rant about ‘the Prophet wanted us to stay home’ ‘women should stay home’ blah blah blah, yadda yadda yadda. And though i thought better than to engage in a ‘discussion’ with her, i couldn’t help but think how narrow minded and literalistic her views were. and let me tell you something i should have told you at the beginning of this post, i am not a ‘progressive muslim’ in the modern, retarded, what the hell are you on about? sense of the word. i wear a scarf, i pray 5 times a day (not the Irshad Manji way), i try (try) to be a good muslim, in the sense that I constantly think about whether or not what I am doing is something God would approve of, be ok with, or not care about and the list goes on. so whilst i understand the idea of the woman being in charge of the home, i don’t agree with the absolutist view that it is the be end all and be all of a women’s roles. i mean as far as i know (which i have to admit is very little), there is no stipulation that women must stay home and just take care of their home. as with many issues in Islam, everything has to be seen within a particular context and particular circumstances. in australia, for example, families are really struggling to make mortgage repayments with one income, many of them get their houses repossessed. must the woman stay home then too? i guess what bothers me the most is that the same people who make such claims with absolute fervor and surety have usually missed the bigger picture so much so that alot of their views contradict each other. these are often the same people who insist on having a female doctor, a female driving instructor (wait this doesn’t really count cause why does she need to drive, right? pfft! im such a tool) basically, a female everything. so really what they are asking for is that all women stay home but also provide essential services for each other without going to university or having practiced their skills in any formal organisation or institution…well i hate to break their miswak (yes i just thought of that hehe), but that ain’t practical. and what about the woman who’s husband decides to up and leave his wife and children, without so much as a second thought. the woman who has stayed home, who has not pursued a tertiary education, who has not had a job for the past 2, 3, 4, 10 years! what then is she supposed to do? how is she supposed to support herself and her children? like i said, if you believe that women should stay home, and only stay home, you are missing so many variables, you’re missing so much of the reality and complexities of life. i do understand the logic and the blessings behind staying home, i really do! if women spent more of their time at home then worrying about a career then maybe we may not have as many social problems as we do. but there is a difference forgoing everything for a career and working in order to maintain a certain level of independence and ‘if something bad happens, i can take care of myself’ness. i don’t believe that being in charge of the home and going to work are mutually exclusive. this is not to say that i sympathise with the ‘women can have it all’ sentiment that the western media keep shoving down our throats. not at all. i just think that women need to be out there, they need to be active members of society because they too have a responsibility to educate, and take care of, and give charity to and support. you can’t just leave everything to men, i mean we tried that and look how far that got us! ; ) no im not a male basher. so i won’t go there. how ironic though that im listening to an old spice girls song at this very moment….

damn the digital

one? fine, two? ok, three? eeeh umm….alright, 50? give me a break!

i am sick to death of people on posting 80 pictures of themselves on facebook! its so frekkin ridiculous, i mean what the hell is the matter with you? do you seriously have such a complex that you have to take the exact same photo of yourself from different angles just so you can satisfy your vanity? my god if you think you look good in one, two or three photos, common sense would tell you that your probably going to look good in the 4th, 5th hell 60th photo! and then ofcourse there are the few anomalies that show you looking fugly, and you’d think with all the good photos you have, you would be able to figure out which ones to show the whole world and which ones you should umm i dunno hide! or maybe even delete!!! (shock horror!) but no you have to put that one up to, the one that makes you look like a 200 pound animorph caught in the middle of morphing because there are icky hairs coming out of all your orifices, yes i mean all of them! and no your photos don’t ‘highlight the different sides of your versatility’ they just make you look like a desperate person who just needs their ego to be constantly stroked through comments on how “hot” you look. i mean you’re actually so thick that the prospect of letting people know that you take your own pictures, pictures of yourself, in your room with ur shitty little mobile phone doesn’t actually bring you to shame? what has the world come to? serenity now!!!

so damn you digital, damn you and all the ills you bring with it! *shakes fist in air*

Sundays are….

Sundays in Aus are fun days cause they’re the days where u catch up on the stuff that needs doing and you do stuff you like to do like bake! I went bake crazy yesterday, making cinnamon scrolls, peanut butter cupcakes and brownies and even after the brownies I wanted to try my hand at making lemon cream cupcakes (I’m sure they would’ve tasted divine) but I decided to put my culinary skills to rest and clean up the kitchen instead which was, by the time I was done with it, an absolute mess! Needless to say I really enjoyed baking all that stuff cause its both relaxing and engaging. However i didnt really enjoy eating it as much, i mean liked what i baked, i mean i liked the taste of two of the things that i baked those two being the scrolls and brownies (the peanut butter cupcakes being too oily for me despite everyone raving about how good they tasted) but I don’t really like it as much as I liked making them, it was so much more meaningful making them than eating them. Maybe this means that true happiness comes with meaningful experiences or maybe it just means that my food wasn’t all that great OR maybe it just means I’m weird….

Goodbye Harry Potter

After a four day long journey, my adventure with Harry Potter has finally come to an end. We parted ways this morning at a quarter to nine, when he went on his way to join his new family with Ginny, and I resumed  adhering to the daily grind by logging on to my computer to check my email and such. But alas it has ended, and I have said my good byes with both sorrow and joy. The journey was much like a roller coaster ride with its highs and low dips, every now and then making you scream, cry and laugh, sometimes provoking these actions all at once. In the end all ended as one would have hoped, save the precious loss of life,  good overcame evil, although it didn’t appear as trenchant at the time. Whilst events seemed slow moving and obscure at first, the hand that created the puzzle lovingly rejoined the pieces together creating an exquisite and intriguing collage of life, love, friendship, loss and death for her loyal followers. Though parting considerably from the previous collection of stories and despite taking some bold steps, Rowling stayed true to the wonderful characters in the story till the end. Her characters, some of whom we have grown to admire and others whom we have come to pity have grown as we have grown over the past 7 years. By drawing parallels between their lives and ours, I believe Rowling sends a powerful message to all who have read her tales about arrogance, tolerance and harmony. Despite, like a parent seeing their child fly from the nest, having mixed feelings about my final goodbye with Harry Potter, I feel ever so grateful for having Harry and his friends in my life, and for that I salute you J.K.

writing is so unfulifilling. i dont quite care if thats not a word. all i know is that writing that sentence didn’t do anything for me…

go away fat, go away

never come back, never stay

you are not wanted

you never will  be

so leave me alone

and stop pestering me!

hey i just rhymed.

i hate it when lecturers and tutors dont reply to your questions when you really need them to. I hate it when you try to explain to something to some one in the best possible way and they dont want to listen and refuse to understand. i hate feeling really low after ive felt really high. this life is so torturous and cruel. if u dont give all of yourself, if you dont let the devil take your soul its like your stuck in a fuckin whoop whoop limbo land. and i mean i dont want to be in that stupid land. its annoying, and painful, and frustrating! so so soooo frustrating. but i mean i guess its not like that all the time. but when it is it feels like its like that allllll the time. and then it happens so often. and sometimes it can just be about the smallest thing.

deciphering me

i hate not being able to verbalize whats in my head. although im not completely sure of what exactly it is that i want to verbalize in the first place. its the product of so many things having accumulated over a great period of time, its become a mishmash, a spaghetti bolognaise cauliflower and potato curry hot pot which i can’t pick and choose from. i wish i could draw out the the thoughts from my mind and put them in a glass jar or flush them down the loo, much like Professor Dumbledore in Harry Potter.